Lazy, Busy, and who knows…

Yes a bit of everything at this point. But the big point is I haven’t posted a damned thing here in the last several days. I am going to chalk most of it up to just being way to busy for my own good, followed by laziness. Most of what I have been doing is working, which has kept me quite busy while here so I don’t have a lot of time to just take a few minutes to post something.

After I get done with work it is off to home where my time is then consumed with working out, then dinner and paying attention to the wife and our puppy. And catching up on the reading I need and want to get done. In the last couple of weeks I have finished a couple of books, one being The Terminal List: A Thriller by Jack Carr, highly recommend giving this a read for sure, it was a great book. The other book I read was The Ragamuffin Gospel: Good News for the Bedraggled, Beat-Up, and Burnt Out by Brennan Manning, also an excellent read which has helped me greatly on my journey back to God.

On the fitness front, I have mainly been doing Crossfit workouts, but I am going to go back to a more strength training/power building type routine at least for a few months, I think I will benefit from it far more as though Crossfit is great it isn’t giving me what I want in terms of strength and size gains/body fat loss. I have also started this week stepping up my eating game, because I seriously haven’t been eating enough food at all and this I am going to put on my wife as she forces her restricted calorie intake on me at times because she thinks I am eating too much, when my reality is I need somewhere in the vicinity of 2500+ calories a day just to maintain. So I decided to avoid letting her dictate so much in terms of what or how I eat in order to get my shit moving in the right direction. End goal still the same 10 – 12% body fat by the end of the summer. Bodyweight isn’t important just composition.

To that end I will do the power building type routine I have done in the past focusing mostly on the big exercises 5 sets of 8 reps for each. Trying to do a couple of different exercises per body part and working each body part once per week to start. Then working my way up to twice per week if I see fit. I will be including some Tabata style finishers at the end of each workout to get in necessary cardio and then doing cardio only on off days.

Well this is it for now, gotta actually get back to work and all.

Later,
The Madman

Ah yes…

And it is almost time for the traveling to home to start.

I have to get my ass up bright and early in the morning around 4AM so that I can get my ass to the airport by 530 or so to catch a 7AM flight out of Austin. And then in between I have to keep my fingers crossed that the weather in the NE cooperates so that I can actually get all the way home.

On another more serious note, because this is something that has been on my mind for a couple of weeks now and since this is my anonymous source of posting things I am going to share this. It strikes a chord for me because I have been clean and sober now for nearly 9 years. But I get to basically watch my wife continue to be in the throws of her own addiction involving food, anorexia to be more specific. She has been obsessed with her weight and how she looks for pretty much the entire time we have been together, which is going on 27 years now, and of course for a good portion of that time she got to experience me in my addiction, and was there for my bottom. It appears that she doesn’t have a bottom and I don’t think she will ever actually see that bottom, and I say that more because of something she said a couple of weeks ago after remarking about how much I ate at dinner (while she left her food pretty much unfinished) as I said to her, if I didn’t force you to eat you would starve to death. At which time she remarked yes I probably would, and she said it with a smile.

She has pretty much been subsisting on maybe around 500 – 600 calories a day for quite some time now, it might even be less, I only ever see her eat dinner in the evening, I don’t know what she actually eats during the day. I also don’t know what she eats when I am traveling, she says she does but I really don’t know.

I have read enough material to know that one can subsist off this little for a long long time, but it will have consequences on ones body, I make sure she gets a vitamin supplement daily, that likely helps. She is obsessed with losing weight, she doesn’t however realize that she has shot out her metabolism and she won’t lose anymore weight at all, and if she starts eating more calories a day she will just gain weight quickly, I am sure, I haven’t mentioned that I just keep trying to get her to eat more.

I worry that her bottom is going to wind up being something quite severe, and it won’t be pretty, I know it will happen, eventually, I just don’t know when. I don’t know how long her body will continue to function before the low amount of calories starts to actually take a real toll, though I am sure it has in some ways, that I am must not noticing as I should.

OK, that is enough for now, I have to go to sleep as 4AM comes early and I want to get my happy ass home!

Later,
The Madman